My Least Favorite Word!

I was recently inspired to take to Facebook and record a quick video in which I spoke about my least favorite word in the English language.

What prompted this was a moment during a recent coaching session with one of my life-coaching clients. We were talking about her relationship with her hubby. “Things are fine,” she had said.

I tried not to wince, but she saw me.

Then we dove in and I shared my detest for that word… Fine.

“Fine?” I asked her. “And that’s working for you?”

She smiled shyly and shook her head. I watched as her eyes lit of up and the realization come over her. “No,” she had said. “Fine is not working for me.”

What about you?

Are there areas of your life that you would you describe as fine?

Are you ok with that?

I’m not!

I didn’t come here for fine. I came here for an exceptional, outstanding, terrific, fantastic, knock-it-out-of-the-park life, and I refuse to settle for fine!

(Can you tell I’m a little passionate about this?)

It all began the day my hubby and I were preparing to go to a wedding. I’d come down the stairs in a dress and heels and asked him how I looked. “Fine,” had been his response.

Can you guess mine?

Let’s just say, he doesn’t use that word anymore to describe my appearance!

And my coaching client? We came up with easy and practical changes and goals in regard to her marriage, which she recently described as “wonderful,” and added, “I kind of hadn’t noticed how we’d just fallen into a routine and settled for the same old, same old.”

What about you? Are there areas of your life you would describe as just fine? Are you ok with that? Do you want to make a shift?

If you’re ready… if fine is no longer acceptable, I’d love to help.

I’m offering 6 free life coaching sessions, and I’d love to give one to you!

We’ll meet over video, and explore what your knock-it-out-of-the-park-life looks like, any blocks and limiting beliefs that are keeping you from getting there, and create a road map that ensures you do. It really is magic and I’d love to share it with you!

This is my mission, my passion and my calling… to help others live exceptional lives full of love, joy, abundance.

First come, first serve, so schedule your session today 

You can also read more about my coaching here or email me at kasey@kaseymathews.com 

And watch the fb video here –

The Magic and Messiness of Motherhood

Hello Friend!

This weekend I’ll be celebrating Mother’s Day with my mom and my daughter, as we travel up to Syracuse, NY for a couple of book events!

On Thursday, I’ll be speaking at an event for a local hospital that’s doing a huge NICU expansion to better meet the needs of families throughout the greater central New York area!

Friday evening, I’ll be at the local Barnes and Noble, reading and signing from A Mom’s Guide to Creating a Magical Life.

Both events feel so timely with the arrival of Mother’s Day weekend!

As I plan for travel, making sure I’m packing all I need, while at the same time ensuring all is taken care of at home, I got thinking about the role of Mom and all that entails.

In particular, the way we need to be so flexible, especially in times when all our planning doesn’t exactly go the way we intended!

I thought back to the time when Preemie was about to be published, and my publisher suggested I make a promo video for the book.

A videographer was arranged, a date was picked, and a basic concept for the video was created.

Lee, myself and the kids on the lake, just being us, just being together.

At ten o’clock the night before we were due to film, the letter I read to my daughter in the video came pouring through, and I knew it was meant to be a part of the video.

I was delighted to have received such a gift and felt it would really enhance the video.

Then at ten thirty, that same night, just as I’d finished writing that letter, the front door opened, bringing in a warm summer breeze, along with Lee and Tucker, who’d been spray painting boat parts in the garage…

And they were both BLUE – like Papa Smurf and Baby Smurf!

I had to hold on to the door frame to keep myself from falling over!

I had to unclench my fists before running over and punching Lee!

I had to take several deep breaths to keep myself from screaming!

And then I had to figure out how we were going to get out of this mess!

Every surface they touched on the way the shower turned blue. The shower curtain had to be thrown out.

An hour later, they were both wrapped in towels, shriveled and shaking – the hot water long gone, but they were mostly not blue.

Then the laughter began. Laughter that could not be stopped.

And I knew in that moment that much of the magic of motherhood comes from those unpredictable, unforgettable, messy moments!

To this day there’s still a blue handprint on the towel rack in the bathroom. For a while, I tried to scrub it off, but it wasn’t going anywhere. Now I look at it and just smile.

And remember. And rest assure, that it’s all perfect.

Messy and perfect.

And here’s the video to prove it!

A Letter to My Daughter

May your Mother’s Day be full of memories, Magic, and maybe even a little messiness!

With love and blessings,

Kasey

 

Getting Creative

For the longest time, I’ve held the belief that there are 3 key practices that are foundational to creating a Magical Life.

1. Movement

2. Meditation

3. Hydration/Nutrition

But lately, I’ve come to realize that there is a 4th necessary element that may be missing in many of our lives.

4. Creativity.

I made this discovery while working with many of my life-coaching clients. They were getting really deliberate and mindful about their daily movement and meditation, drinking water, eating healthy foods, but still, there seemed to be something missing.

And that missing element turned out to be an outlet for creativity.

I invite you to think about that and notice if and how you’re expressing yourself creatively.

Just like movement and meditation – if you’ve only got 5 minutes, spend 5 minutes.

* Put pen to paper and write – make a list of all the places in the world you’d love to visit

* Work on a jigsaw or crossword puzzle

* Pick up a few containers of play dough

* Doodle in a notepad

* Plant some flowers

* Open a tray of watercolor paints

* Pick up a coloring book

* Strum a guitar, play a keyboard, bang a bongo

* Play with yarn and knitting needles

* Make a fairy house in the nook of a tree

* Try a new recipe

Your turn…

*

*

*

…and then notice.

Notice what happens and how do you feel when you start getting deliberate about bringing creativity into your life. Perhaps this new practice ignites something that may have been dormant within you for a while.

I can’t wait to hear if discovering creative outlets that feed your soul, creates more Magic in your life!

The Gift of Connection

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My 2019 word of the year is Connection.

Which reminds me of a story about the incredible power of connection.

A few weeks after my first book, Preemie: Lessons in Love, Life, and Motherhood was released, I was traveling to speak at an event in front of a large crowd in Forth Worth, Texas.

The airport parking garage was full, which meant a satellite lot and a shuttle bus to the airport. I was already nervous about my talk, so this just made me more stressed.

On the bus, the only seat left was next to an older gentleman in a navy sport coat. The gentleman whose name I later learned was Jim, asked where I was headed. We chatted about my book, and then about his daughters.

Just as we were about to get off the bus, a little voice in my head suggested I give him a copy of my book. I was reluctant, because all my other copies had been shipped to the event, and it was the only copy I had with me – but I honored the voice, and put the book in his hand.

Six months later, I received a two-page handwritten letter. “I’m not sure if you’ll remember me, but a while back we rode a bus together, and you gave me a copy of your book.” I smiled, remembering Jim. Then I read on: “Your beautiful story and positive outcome were, for me, the encouragement and validation I needed to help my wife and me through the deep grief of losing our daughter last January.”

I keep that letter in the top drawer of my desk, and often think about the circumstances that had to occur that day in order for our paths to cross.

I can’t help but wonder if we’re always being guided toward those with whom we are meant to connect.

That moment continues to inspire me to stay open, to listen, and to act upon that quiet voice from within. I hope it does for you, too.

Feed Your Body and Soul

Do you ever have those days where you’ve got tons to do and feeding yourself ends up at the bottom of the list?

Or the better question may be – do you ever NOT have those days?

To show up as my best self and take care of everyone else, I know I have to make sure I’m eating, and often when I’m on the run, there are not a lot of great choices.

That’s why, when my nutritionist introduced me to these amazing no-bake protein bites, I was so excited!

The recipe is super easy, gluten-free, and packed with protein. I took a batch to my daughter’s ski race last weekend and they were gobbled right up!

Here’s a video I made a while back to show how I make them –

Don’t mind me licking my fingers as I cook!!!!

If you have a favorite go-to healthy recipe, I’d love to hear about it! Please share in the comment section below!

Setting the Tone

photo credit – David Mao on unsplash

What’s the first thing you do in the morning?

Do you grab your phone and see what text messages and emails arrived overnight?

Do you flip on the tv and start your day with a dose of morning news?

Do you jump out of bed and go from 0-60 to start the daily race of taking care of everyone else?

No judgement, truly. Just asking you to invite in some awareness.

One of my coaching clients shared the most beautiful moments with me the other day. She recognized that she had fallen in the habit of waking each day and immediately grabbing her phone, followed by turning on the tv and dosing herself with the morning news. Looking to create new habits that set a more positive tone for the day, she began waking a little earlier and beginning each day with a quiet meditation. She reports that it has totally changed how she feels throughout the rest of her day. And here’s the ever so beautiful part. She noticed that her pre-teen daughter was waking up crabby and out of sorts nearly every day, so rather than playing her meditation alone in her bedroom, my ever-so-wise client, now goes into her daughter’s room every morning and lies on her floor and plays her meditation there. She says that it has completely changed the tone of their mornings and her daughter leaves for school happy and centered. How gorgeous is that?

Now I know many of you say, but I don’t even know how to meditate. Really? Do you know how to sit on a chair? Or lie on the bed or the floor? Of course you do! Really, that’s it. Just give yourself a few moments of stillness. And if you like, play a piece of music that soothes your soul, or choose one of the many amazing free meditations from this great app – Insight Timer

Remember, you get to choose how you begin each and every day. Start to notice your habitual behaviors and decide whether those habits are serving you. And if not, make a shift. You may be amazed to find that these simple change can have profound effects on your life.

Music as Self-Care

How do you define self-care?

Many of us seem to think that self-care involves white terry-cloth robes, spa appointments, and day-long commitments.

But I believe true and deep self-care is made up of moments – simple, magical moments we give to ourselves throughout our days.

This past weekend my self-care practice was blasting soul-nourishing songs as I brought order to the house.

I must have played this one I Won’t Give Up six or seven times, singing at the top of my lungs.

The line… I see that you’ve come so far, to be right where you are, how old is your soul… brought tears and chills each and every time. God knows we’re worth it.

I invite you to put on a favorite piece of music and let it move you, in whatever way that may be…

…lying down and letting the music wash over you and tears flow out

…dancing in gorgeous circles around your living room

…moving to yoga

…sitting quietly

there is no right or wrong way.

It’s simply all about what feels right and true to you and your soul.

(Photo by Hannah Olinger on Unsplash)

 

Holiday Perfection

 

The December issue of Country Living Magazine is sitting on my kitchen counter.

On the cover, there’s a pretty white farmhouse.

In front of the house sits an old mint-green truck with a freshly cut Christmas tree on top. Every window on the house has a wreath with red bows and garland hangs from the porch rails.

I wonder what it must feel like to live in a house decorated like that.

I imagine how special it must feel to celebrate the holidays in a house like that.

I look around my house.

The tree is up, but there are no light or ornaments yet.

I bought two wreaths but they’re sitting on the front porch floor.

My dining room table is covered with boxes of decorations and ornaments.

I look again at the magazine and wonder how other people do it.

How do they get their houses to look so perfect?

And I don’t mean just the houses in the magazines.

I mean all the houses I pass in my neighborhood and surrounding towns.

Where do they find the time to create such perfection?

It seems I go through this every year.

These feelings of being not good enough.

Of feeling overwhelmed.

Feeling exhausted before it’s all even started.

And then that voice in my head asks me, What is perfect?

Wasn’t it perfect last week getting to sit with my parents for all those uninterrupted hours after my Dad’s surgery?
(He’s home and doing really well)

Wasn’t it perfect driving to Vermont to meet my sister for a pre-holiday lunch and walk our dogs along the river?

Wasn’t it perfect sitting next to my girl at the latest Mother-Daughter flick at our local cinema?

Or even writing this email and sharing these thoughts with you?

I could have been hanging wreaths and putting up decorations, but look what I would have missed!

So instead of beating myself up, I’ll remind myself, and you, that what’s really perfect is slowing down, loving life exactly as it is, showing up exactly as we are and being present to yourself and those you love.

That, as far as I’m concerned, is Perfect.

Ask Yourself: What Do You Need

When our daughter was little, there were times when she was so out of sorts, I felt helpless in helping her.

One day, I opened up to a friend and shared this with her. In return, she offered the suggestion of asking our girl the simple question – What do you need?

That question became my magical go-to.

I remember the numerous times I knelt down, put my hands on her bony shoulders, and asked her, What do you need?

Often, she didn’t know, but the fact that I cared to ask and listen, seem to be exactly what she needed.

I offer this to you today, because so often, many of us find ourselves in times of uncertainty and feeling out of sorts.

This is an opportunity to ask ourselves this very question– What do I need?

And in response, just listen.

Let your voice from within tell you what you need.

Maybe you’ll hear:

Rest.

A bath.

A good cry.

A long walk.

The cup of tea with a friend.

A turkey sandwich with lots of cranberry.

A romantic comedy.

A night out belly up to the bar with with a salted margarita.

A pillow to punch and get all my anger out.

What do you need?

Your turn.

Ask yourself – What do I need?

Write down the first things you just heard.

And let the Magic begin!

How to Respond with Gratitude

How to respond with gratitude

Last week, my life was full of Magical Moments – but probably not the kind you’re imagining.

On Monday, we discovered that we’d accidentally cut the gas line to the stove while doing some DYI landscaping (no explosions or injuries, thank God!)

Tuesday, the septic backed up and had to be pumped.

Wednesday, the plumbers arrived to repair the first-floor bathroom emergency and were back on Thursday when the problem reemerged.

Friday, the 12 yards of landscape stone arrived from an hour away and turned out to be the wrong stone.

You can’t make this stuff up, right?

So why in the world would I say I had a week full of Magical Moments?

Here’s how. I applied the Magic Formula that I learned years ago from Jack Canfield.

E + R + O
Event + Response + Outcome

Here how it works.

You can’t really control the events that happen in your life, right? i.e. cut gas line, septic backing up…

But what you can control is your Response to the Event, which in turn, controls/determines the Outcome.

That is where the Magic happens.

Last week I could have responded to the chaotic events by feeling all poor me. Instead, I put the Magic E + R = O formula to work and quickly changed to a response of gratitude. Gratitude that folks were able to respond so quickly, I got to meet so many helpful and friendly people, and our problems were solved.

Now it’s your turn!

Put this Magic Formula in your back pocket and carry it with you, so whenever an unexpected Event arises. You get to choose your Response and see how that affects the Outcome.

Here’s to hoping your days are full of even more Magical Moments as a result!